Long Dark Nights

"Momma, I miss our brother." 

says our precious three year old Bethany. 

 I know that she does. 

We might not know his name, but we have been praying for this child for a long time. 

We announced we were adopting in June to the whole community, 

but our family has been talking about this for over a year already. 

I miss him. I long for him. We are waiting on him. 

 "Me too, baby." 

 How is that all I am able to reply? 

 Perhaps is is the knot in my stomach, or the tears welling up in my throat. 

 Or the fear with just a few more words the grief and longing I am experiencing will spill out. 

 "When can he come home?" 

When will he come home? 

I wish I had some sort of an answer. 

 Everyday feels like a new hoop. Another set of paperwork. 

 More waiting and struggle. 

 We still have to send our Dossier in before we get on a waiting list. 

 And then the waiting list can take forever, before we even get to see meet him. 

 "I don't know for sure." 

And there it is. 

The tears are falling. And my heart aches. 

 Because, I don't know for sure. 

 "That isn't a good answer," 

she replies. 

 And she is right. 

 But that is the answer we have. 

 And so the dark long nights of waiting are here. 

 Waiting. 

Praying. 

 Hoping. 

Dreaming. 

 #bishopfamilyadopts #waitingforonemore #bethegood